I just done my assingment which is a short essay for Film Studies with my buddy from yesterday midnite untill this earlier morning around 3am.
I really missing about him all the time, i wish to be around him wish to meet him on the spot .Such complex feeling caused me hard to concerntrate on my working progress anywhere i really realised that the feeling of REGRET in my heart.
I regret i never appreciate him when he treat me good,
I regret i never appreciate him when his tears drop for me,
I regret i never appreciate him when he trying his best to show his concern to me ,
i regret i never appreciate his patient towards my Emo tone and weird mood all the time,
I regret i never appreciate him when he worry bout my "madness" and willing to leave his work and back to malaysia to meet me.
I really regret and wish the time can turn back like last time.
Dear, do you know why,
why i never appreciate your kindness to me?
why i treat u so cool and always cannt be obedient to you?
why i always make you cry make u angry make u worry about me?
Because i very worry that u will leave me while i used to the way how good u treat to me.
Thus, i force myself cannt used to it , no appreciate it.Because i really cannt stand for it when u wont treat me good anymore.
Then , i started to be cruel to myself and to you.
Can u imagine,
no anyone can be so deep into my heart so close with my soul as you.
Thus, i started feel more scare to face the fact of losing you
Dear, when the more cruelier am i ,
The love from you became more strengthen.
I know how painful u felt but it is worthful for the future memories .
As one of my very admire lecturer Chua she did mention that" Human always choice to memorize the sad ending rather than the happy ending of the movie, theater ,novel ,etc"
I want you to remember me forever,
This is why i act to be like this,
This is why my love never kind to anyone.
Dear, i will appreciate the every second moments spent with you ,
i truelly in loved with you.
Miharu Yong
17Feb 09
Missing you in K.L
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